End of City Sleeps

The subject title says it all.

It is the end of the band City Sleeps as we know it. One of the saddest part is that "Not an Angel" was just about to drop as their next single. The music video was shot and completed.. my dear E! I will always hold a place in my heart for the band but I look forward to new projects...

Listen to "Not an Angel" by City Sleeps.

: /

This whole guitar thing is on hold. Maybe I was too ambitious.. Maybe I wasn't ambitious enough. Maybe I was too busy working from day to night.

I'm in the market for a decent guitar again!

Girl vs. Woman

I'm tired of hearing "It's interesting that you refer to yourself as 'girl' instead of 'woman'" or something to this effect...

I suddenly wanted to listen to "Not a girl, Not yet a woman" by Britney Spears. Yay..

Back.

I don't think it's psychological at all. I will probably still refer to myself as a girl until I am forty. I mean, I don't know--probably. I don't always refer to myself as a 'girl,' yes I've referred to myself as a woman. It's strange and forced. I make a serious effort to substitute 'girl' with 'woman.' Notice this! I could say the same when referring to other ....girls/women...

I'm Freakin' weird. Weird that it irritates me.

Photo Blog!

I have a new blog (http://Syl-Life.blogspot.com)! It is an addition to this blog as opposed to a replacement of this blog. That’s my intention anyway. I plan to be a lot more diligent with the other. I guess it’s more like a photo diary. I don’t know what it is, I just think I should put my cell cam—no matter how crappy it is—to work for once!

You'll have to forgive me for the poor quality of images, the randomness of the content, and its dull nature...

I do intend to post a new image/blurb at least once a day. Heck, I'm at a computer all day long (and sometimes all night long). Why not? Peace!

I don't know what to title this, Part I

Sometimes I write blogs and never post them. Earlier I found a draft from March 2007 and it seemed more appropriate now than ever..

I have a good friend who insists that your twenties are a time for experimentation and self-discovery....ONLY. He insists we don't reach the brink of adulthood until the age of thirty. Marriage, children, even serious relationships, he says, have no place in your youth. His big-picture message is: don't date until you're thirty, don't get married until you're thirty, don't even consider having kids until you're thirty. That we are only children ourselves...

It's not like this is a hard and pressing issue but every now and then I wonder where I stand on this. Do I think he is right? Sound logic, valid points, etc... Or, do I disagree?

At 22, I am still learning, still growing, still changing. I don't believe some inherit traits will magically disappear when the clock strikes midnight on December 24 2013, anyway, if ever. My contradictory hopefulness and hopelessness..comes to mind. I hope that, as an "adult", I will be more independent, more secure, more final, more a lot of things. I am nurturing these things in my 20's you see..

I just know that, now more than ever, I am not ready for that "adult stuff." I'm not ready for a serious relationship, I am not ready for marriage, I am not ready for children. I know that this might bring you to a gasp considering how prematurely I used to think this was perfectly OK. More than OK... I needed it to happen before the age of 30. What can I say, I was young...

I know that I will be ready someday and I hope "someday" is reasonable, I even hope that "someday" changes and that "someday" is some day sooner than later. I guess I would be OK with defying my good friend. It's entirely hypocritical-- that statement right there is contradicting almost everything I just wrote above, don't you think? To be honest, it's possible that I have no idea what I am talking about. Writing to myself, like talking or thinking to myself, is just a medium for clarifying what it is I really want, who I really am, stuff like that. It's possible, too, that I don't know if I suddenly want to agree with my friend because I want to buy myself time, because I am incapable of being in a relationship, because others are incapable of being with me, because I don't want to get hurt anymore.... or a combination of that and because I truly require x many years for experimentation and self -discovery only.

[ unfinished]

It is mostly nonsense... though still and especially appropriate at this juncture in life. It also goes to show I have no idea what I am talking about most of the time. March of last year.. geez.